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willow_sky
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Name: sky
Country: Malaysia
Metro: Kuala Lumpur
Birthday: 4/17/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: guitar,bass,drums(wanna jam on a drum set),sports car,street racing(i hate F1,so boring)sleep,eat,breathe,watch tv,erm..wait,have to slowly think .oh,blogging,berborak with ppl,God,med,games(comp and ps2)
Expertise: breathe,sleep,eat....
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
MSN: siew_kim_yeo@hotmail.com
Member Since:
3/10/2006
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| okay..i'm redirecting!!!
dun worry..will still blog here from time to time.if i feel like it coz here got alot of stories also..hehe
so,new add is...
click here la
make life easier no?
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| kays..so i'm back again...
been awhile since i blogged cause everytime i open and sign in,i feel so depressed cause of the previous entry that serves as a ghastly reminder of what has happened..so instead of blogging,i end up signing out and returning to my staggering mountain to keep up with things..
in case ur wondering what i meant in the previous blog..its not about someone who has kicked the bucket,neither is it a pet or what-so-ever...
i just failed my summative...which was really depressing..as much as i forsaw it since i wasn't as prepared as i should have been and doubling with the fact that i caught a REALLY stubborn fever that refuse to go away even after i sweated like crazy and down enough panadols to kill my liver..so yea,i failed and it was really depressing for me cause i was really aiming to pass the very least.and to make matters worst,having to break the news to my parents and grandparents,which i eventually did after giving myself time to prepare for the on-coming slaughter from them.but the slaughtering part never came..instead what followed was far worst..
disappointment!!!!!and silent treatment..maybe my friend was right,their trying to do reverse psychology on me to study more(and oddly,i think its working)..
so yeah,thanks for all ur concern btw..
as luck would have had it,i'm sick again,exactly 1 month after..hoping its nothing contagious..4 days of bed ridden,and now i'm hopefully able to bounce back to normal since i've been coped up in bed and laggin on my work..
orientation's starting soon...yea!!!cant' wait,bpham started theirs ledi..looks like fun..went to curi-curi see how their games went today and it was ok la...not as messy and as noisy as when i went through it.wonder if it'l be the same or not since there is so many alterations to the rules and regulations..if i pass EOS,me want to run for orientation committee*beams* IF i pass la..if i fail,might as well start appplying for MRS degree or something..
so yea,sem 2 started ledi(like WAYYYYY BACK)..and things aren't as fun as before..classes in the afternoon is a drag coz it literally feels like it drains the entire day leaving u with not much things to do like go for movies after lectures etc...so it sucks..and then there's CSU and pbl sessions twice a week(yippee!!!!so sarcastic)but we manage to fix that by convincing our dear faci to blend 2 pbl sessions into 1..though i'm starting to forsee a problem when the next sem comes in..oh well,leave the headache's till later(which reminds me of my throbbing headache at the moment)
bought HP last book...oddly,i'm not so enthusiastic to read it as i was with the previous books.KX already finished it in less than 2 days and the book has been with me ever since(think that was like 3 days ago) and i haven even gone past chap 1.its just sitting there rotting in my drawer(literally)..haven even touch House season3 either...let alone The Unit(unfortunately,its with granpa already so all hopes of seeing it as flown all the way to Kuantan...lolz) guess my enthu for everything went down my clean toilet when i got my results..or maybe cause i'm not so hyped bout HP like everyone else since i DID read the last few pages coz i was just curious>_<....to end the long story short.....i shall not tell incase i get bombardment from some who do not want spoilers..hehe..but i already know what'l roughly happen in the end so..guess thats why i dun feel the urge to read it..lalalala...contemplating on watchin the movie..
CPR!!!why do we have to take it is beyond me..i highly doubt anyone who knows CPR is going to admit they know it when the time comes cause :
1)they are too busy panicking
2)the person in need of saving is not the kind of person they dream of saving
3)they are malaysians....'i dunno and i don't care'
so yea,why do we have to take this?cause IMU says 'We care"..although i'm willing to bet in REALLLLY small fonts next to the word care is "about your money ONLY"..probably microscopic thats why it doesn't appear so obvious...anyways,back to CPR..another exam to demoralize you when u fail and a gained advantage to IMU cause u have to pay to resit..and what happens if u don't intend to resit?nothing..except u'l probably be sipping tea with the dean who'd like a private audience with you and try to psycho u into retaking it..or somewhere there...sigh...
with that,i shall hit my moutain and try to level it to the level of my table...haha..as if that'l happen...
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| to those who knows wats goin on la...honestly,i appreciate your concerns and sympathy for what has happened and i'm rally touched by ur sms-es and all.i know i'm suppose to accept it and all that and get over it.blah blah blah....point here is i know..and i don't need alot of reminders bout it thanks.i maybe be blur and all that and forgetful bout many things but i am not so incompetent to know what i have to do now..
really,thanks for those messages coz it shows that you care(although i wonder which birdy told you all bout it,i need to apply for a gun license and shoot that bird down).thanks guys..
but what i really need right now,is not more sms-es of how sorry u feel for me and all that...words work to a certain extent but anymore than that and it becomes a pain to read.no,neither is words by mouth or pats on the back or hugs or whatever it is.and neither is chocolates this time round. but thanks for the support u guys have shown.
i just need some time alone.i need space and i need to reflect back...i just want to be alone for the next few days to go things over with and try to swallow it all forcefully.i know the next one is coming soon,and there is alot more to catch up on..so please,even if i have gotten over it,i'd appreciate it if we just stick to being our usual self and don't handicap me..starting now k..
thanks so much again guys..love you all eventhough i don't show it that much or i show it the other way round..u guys are great people..see u in lectures kay
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| YESH!!summative is FINALLY OVER!!!
well,couldnt say it went well..half,no 3/4 the time i was there staring blankly at the question wondering,'WHAT THE HECK ARE THEY ASKING FOR???"
yes,it proves i didn't study enough and YES it proves i wasn't as prepared as i thought i was.that i can account for since 2 days before the paper i was suddenly struck with FEVER AND FLU!!and NO,this is not an excuse as i had hundreds of witness to that event.so yea,the last 2 days which i was suppose to spend cramming last bits of info was left with me lying like a dead corpse in bed,groaning in pain from the muscle aches that accompanied it and the ever rising fever.don't you just hate it when it happens at the prime of your life?ok,we shall assume that summative = prime of MY life..so that allows it to stand..yeah!oddly,with the amount of water i drink everyday and the amount of herbal tea when it came about didn't help subsiding it.in fact,it made it go HIGHER!! i seriously felt like my whole body was on fire,even the sponge went dry within half an hour(and this i'm not kidding).that was how high my fever was.the again.maybe it was also due to the fact that even though i should be resting,i was still pushing myself to sit on my table and study.guess thats stubborn me,even when my body is crying out to rest i still ignore its calls.hehe...dun worry,i wouldn't do anything to kill myself,i know my limits..
oddly too,prior to the summative, i had TONS of ideas and plans on what to do once its over but...
but....
BUT!!!!!!
i'm suddenly clueless and lost not..
sweatness...
suddenly there's no need to rush to study,in fact i don't even feel like studying..unlike before where every night will see me bounded to my chair with stack high notes and thick books opened to odd pages for reference.now its...empty..i actually cleared it all in a flash and now stands a SOMEWHAT neater table than before*grinz*
maybe i shall start with cleaning up my room and clearing out my junk..then again,that is always the case cause somehow during the course of my prep,my room is transformed to a version of tornado's HIT- and -RUN case.hehe...have a good excuse to back it up,honestly>_<..then there's also the case when AFTER i start,i just feel like moving things abit and consider it done(usually after shifting a few books from the table to the shelves)*innocent grinz again*
oh well..that list of fun things to do after exams has suddenly vapourised..i have a whole week to kill and a new list to keep me occupied..better start working on it now and finish it before i go back to prison time..hehe...
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| a mother's worries has no end.it starts the moment she conceives a new life in her womb until she breathes her last.no one can ever fathom the depths of a mother's worries unless they go through that process themselves.what will her child be like?how will they live?do they have enough to support the child?what kind of crowd will they mix with?and when they leave the nest,are they doing fine without their mum to look out for them?(or of course the killer question of 'When will i see my grandchildren?')day and night,a mother's 24/7 task is her kids,getting them to the right school,making sure they do well,are fed well and are constantly on par with the world.all these may seem like torture to the kid but hopefully,one day,they will realize (like i have now) that its not that their mums wanted to burden them to be top,they just want to make sure that they succeed in life and not end up the trash of society.not one mother in this world,as much as she may be a druggy or a drunkard etc,will ever want her child to grow up the trash of society.even if they don't show it,its harboured deep inside.i can bet on it.they just don't know how to show it.and besides,different people have different ways of showing it.someone once told me that everytime a mother canes her child,its not the child that feels the most pain,its the mother.they say that her heart breaks with every stroke of the cane she delivers.so a child may be caned on the limbs and such,but a mother is canning herself in her heart.and we all know that the heart is the most vulnerable thing in a human's soul.i'm also double betting,no mother ever wanted to raise a child to be a murderer or a killer or a rapist.i actually wonder how the mother's of these people feel like.one thing i can be sure of,they probably feel like they have failed in raising their kids.
then comes a certain time in the child's years where they gain the freedom of wheels and touch their so called adult hood.the peak of a mothers worries.(this is the paragraph someone should be reading....)i can understand why mothers go frantic when their kid doens't come home at their usual time,or when they go out late at night.who knows what could happen the following day?imagine her waking up to see her child's face first thing in the morning news,and mind you its not bout best achievement but something mother's would always dread.as it is in the papers everyday,there is bound to be atleast 1 case of either knock-rob-kill or knock-rape-kill.if a mother reads these news everyday and still can end up not worrying about her kids concern of going out late at night and coming home in the wee hours of the morning,that mother is either 'dead' in her conscious as a mother or her kid is not her own flesh and blood.could be more reasons but i cant be listing them all out.what more of cases where parents find it hard to believe their kids are the ones who dun-it.as it is,we live in a society of 2 faces.they can be angels at home,but devils outside.parents will be in shock to find their kids are druggies or rapist or murderers.then the question of trust comes in for some.are my parents trusting me enough?why do they always want to call to keep tab of me?do they think i'm lying?
not that they do,but with ever occuring cases like these in the news everyday,wouldn't you say you'd be concern as a parent?maybe one day you will.but let me share what i've learnt of this.its not that they don't trust you,although to a certain degree they do not trust you but its more like they are WORRIED about you.as mention before,no parent would ever want to wake up the next day to find their kids face in the morning news or receive calls from the last place they expect to be called too@hospital or the police station.and frankly,as i recall from a scene in LOTR's FOTR( fellowship of the ring),as they King Theoden said as he laid his son's body to rest, "No parent should ever bury their son(child) before them".so you see,you cant blame ur mum for going the extra mile to find out where you are or what your doing all the time.she just wants to know so that she can be rest assured and at peace in knowing her child's not going in the direction of her worst nightmares.and to add the cherry on the top,if she cannot contact you how much more amplified her doubts and worries will be.of course the child might mis-interpret this as the mother being a busybody,untrusting to them and trying to ruin their life etc because it feels like they are zapping the fun out of life.i know because i've been there before.but i have come to the point where my views have changed.
no one CAN ever fathom a mother;s worries.but they can get a rough idea bout it,least i did after a certain series of events that started last night and lasted till noon today.what started out as a call of worry from a friends mother turn out to be an eye opener for me about a lesson everyone's been trying to teach me.it would have taken me minutes to understand but instead,it took me years and a third persons' view of the same events to understand it.guess i really am a slow learner but it could be a sign that i am growing up right?now that i've understand why my mother worries bout me all the time,why she doesn't allow me to go out at night eventhough most of the happening things happen then and why she demands that i call her everytime there's a change of plans or when i'm leaving a place.i understand mummy.
here's to all the mother's in the world who has the toughest job ever yet still love it to bits because they have found the greatest joy ever..they may nag at you,they may constantly harassed you about a particular guy or girl,they may force food down you throat,tell you what to wear,force you to practice the piano and weed the garden(then again,thank God she poured kerosine on that darn grass..lol,a different issue all together)but above all...THEY LOVE YOU!!!and they just want the best for their babies.
have you ever realized who's the last to sit at the table?who is the first to say they are full when they see that the food on the table is not enough for the family?who is willing to sleep beside you when your sick through the night and watch over you,wipe your head and check your temperature?who nags at you when ur results are dropping when they should be going up?who takes concern of your well-being?who ensures you have food on the table so that you can have breakfast lunch and dinner and never complain your hungry?best of all,who tended to you when you were a lil helpless baby in a cradle and could do nothing but cry?.....who will cry at your graduation ceremony and wedding?
the tears of a mother has many meanings behind it.the hugs and kisses of a mother works miracles.the love of a mother knows no bounds.
ps,mum if you ever stumble on this..know that i still will be the rebellious kid you've known all your life*grinz*cause you have to admit,life would be boring if there's no one to fight with at home right?after all,jie has taken the role of the fulfilling,good and obedient daughter,babyboy the role of the faithful son who'l carry the family name etc...but the role of the rebellious kid is empty..so guess who has to fill in? imagine if you had 2 obedient and good daughters who never fight with you...life would be too simple to enjoy,wouldn't it??but i still love you mummy.
and to that someone this whole entry is meant for actually,thank your mum for me.if she hadn't done those things,i would still be in the dark and blinded bout this.appreciate her and love her to bits,no matter how hard it may seem.maybe one day,you'l see it from a third person's view and understand. and thank you for if you weren't my friend,this whole event wouldn't have occurred.cheers!!!
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